WetriXXX Dating

On today's episode of 'Ask Secret_lade'....  

secret_lade 47F
14481 posts
1/11/2022 12:48 am
On today's episode of 'Ask Secret_lade'....


We'll talk about what NOT to say when trying to meet members of the opposite sex.

As you all know, it's the opening line that gets the attention.

Funny, intelligent, artfully crafted openers will draw me in every time... Long enough to catch my attention but not so long I'm reading about the best friend in kindergarten who grew up to be an eye doctor.

As a wearer of eye glasses.... I think I might actually like to meet that kindergarten best friend. I feel we may have something in common!

But, I digress...

Just keep it simple!

And, for God's sake, avoid these openers altogether!

-Are you real?
-im in town for the weekend wanna hookup
-i have 8 inces to feed ya
-I'm going through some shit, I'd like to just fuck for a while to get my mind off it.


I'm here to say, those openers?? Those openers are just a disaster waiting to happen. Nothing good can come of saying those words to ANYONE.

Especially me.

I see openers like this and and I see a smoldering dumpster fire just waiting to rage out of control. Exchange a message or two and you've got a blazing inferno of failed marriages and anger issues, topped off with a restraining order on top!

Yah..... No.

I had received one of those messages last weekend and did not respond. I was tempted to say, no I'm not real, but I didn't. I just left it unanswered and chose to move on.

Fast forward to yesterday morning when the sender messaged me again, this time with a semi-heartfelt message stating he was new to the online dating scene and he needed some help.

I felt bad for him.

And messaged him back.

I explained a few of the frustrations that I experience on the site in hopes that he could use it to better his approach, possibly help him out a little on his quest, and hoped he'd be able to use the info for good and not evil.

That backfired in my face and now this dumpster fire is burning out of control.

Fantastic!

Wish me luck folks, I'm going to need a pretty big fire extinguisher for this one!

Happy Tuesday!

secret_lade 47F
9042 posts
1/20/2022 10:49 pm

    Quoting Piper3654K:
    I have pretty much the same blog. Awesome. It's amazing what strangers will say to each other.
Most of the time it's easier to tell something to a stranger than it is to tell loved ones.


secret_lade 47F
9042 posts
1/20/2022 10:48 pm

    Quoting vaughnc3:
    I'm so sorry, but I burst out laughing at the end of this post. No good deed goes unpunished. Good Luck.
You are so right! No good deed does go unpunished!


vaughnc3 56M  

1/19/2022 6:56 pm

I'm so sorry, but I burst out laughing at the end of this post. No good deed goes unpunished. Good Luck.


Piper3654K 51M  
132 posts
1/19/2022 4:33 pm

I have pretty much the same blog. Awesome. It's amazing what strangers will say to each other.


secret_lade 47F
9042 posts
1/13/2022 5:31 pm

    Quoting Freefallend:
    A young boy was walking with his father when they saw two dogs having sex. The boy asked what they were doing and his father told him,"the dog in back has sore paws and the other dog is helping him home". The boy thought about it and said," isn't that how it goes dad? You try to help someone and end up getting screwed"
I like your analog!


Freefallend 69M  
27 posts
1/13/2022 9:17 am

A young boy was walking with his father when they saw two dogs having sex. The boy asked what they were doing and his father told him,"the dog in back has sore paws and the other dog is helping him home". The boy thought about it and said," isn't that how it goes dad? You try to help someone and end up getting screwed"


secret_lade 47F
9042 posts
1/12/2022 3:43 pm

    Quoting william4fun2022:
    Who would have thought basic human decency was in such short supply online....
It's very disappointing that people do this stuff and don't bat an eye about it.... There is still a human being on the other side of that computer screen, a human being with thoughts and feelings.


william4fun2022 41M
5 posts
1/12/2022 2:06 pm

Who would have thought basic human decency was in such short supply online....


hogknot 55M  
1050 posts
1/12/2022 11:50 am

    Quoting secret_lade:
    Has it ever worked for you? LOL For me, no, not a good opening line. Now, if it's someone I've known for a while and felt an attraction to, that's a different story.
It has never worked for me because I've never tried it. I agree with you that it is different with someone you know.


secret_lade 47F
9042 posts
1/12/2022 12:48 am

    Quoting justskin1:
    I am a Standard so cannot read mail but I go on cam and sometimes get some really crude lines and the hell of it is they usually live hundreds if not thousands of miles away.
    I have no problem with my opening lines as I don't use them. I am not looking on here. Gave that up about 6 years ago. The shit some guys say and then they wonder why they are so desperate.
    Glad I don't get mail.
Some people lose all sense of decency and decorum when they're hiding behind the secret veil of the internet. In real life, they are probably weak and wouldn't say shit if they had a mouthful, so I can't help but feel pity for those people.... How sad of a life they must be leading.


secret_lade 47F
9042 posts
1/12/2022 12:43 am

    Quoting lonlyforlove2:
    It is a sham that when you give your best efort to help and some one takes asvantage.. It has been a while but I have been there done that!! hHard to catch it all the time, Have a nice evening, stay warm, they say snow here for the weekend, I wish you would keep it all up there, we don't know what to do with it..
It's 30 degrees outside right now, so it's warmed up a hair. Time to break out the shorts! LOL As for the other, some people just can't be helped.


justskin1 70M
13069 posts
1/11/2022 8:34 pm

I am a Standard so cannot read mail but I go on cam and sometimes get some really crude lines and the hell of it is they usually live hundreds if not thousands of miles away.
I have no problem with my opening lines as I don't use them. I am not looking on here. Gave that up about 6 years ago. The shit some guys say and then they wonder why they are so desperate.
Glad I don't get mail.

If you see me in the real world, come say "Hi Justskin."

I always behave. Preferably not well.


lonlyforlove2 79M  
30714 posts
1/11/2022 6:13 pm

It is a sham that when you give your best efort to help and some one takes asvantage.. It has been a while but I have been there done that!! hHard to catch it all the time, Have a nice evening, stay warm, they say snow here for the weekend, I wish you would keep it all up there, we don't know what to do with it..

Stop by at lonlyforlove2
also see Lunch with Lonly , we get snow tomorrow
Check my blog on New Community, "A photo of my big Pecker"
also, " My Sunday afternoon with the kids'


secret_lade 47F
9042 posts
1/11/2022 4:43 pm

    Quoting pagancountrygirl:
    That's why I love...and use the hell out of....the BLOCK feature! Not only do I click block when on the message section but I go into my blocked list and make sure all the boxes are checked and saved so I don't hear from that person again.
I really need to start doing that more often. I have done it to a few people who were being harassive to me on here, but haven't used that feature as much as I should have.


secret_lade 47F
9042 posts
1/11/2022 4:40 pm

    Quoting MrRareity:
    I have 8" for ya if you can handle it...lol. I would never think in a million years to say that to someone I was trying to impress. But it doesn't surprise me that others do. I must admit that once again I was kind of laughing when I read this, I think I know you well enough that you weren't joking around. Here's an idea don't write back to him again instead write to me.
There isn't a whole lot that surprises me on here anymore.... Sad to say. And, this is coming from the woman who has had a man wearing a diaper in his profile photo trying to contact her on IM for 3 days in a row. Sheesh! I may just take you up on your offer and write you instead.


secret_lade 47F
9042 posts
1/11/2022 4:25 pm

    Quoting citizen4722:
    Those openers are closures for sure
Yes they are!


secret_lade 47F
9042 posts
1/11/2022 4:24 pm

    Quoting New2Midlo:
    And this is why we don't respond to those who we aren't interested in, class.
Yep!


secret_lade 47F
9042 posts
1/11/2022 4:24 pm

    Quoting jolielaide:
    he asked for help and you did, you gave him some. my guess is that it wasn't the type of 'help' he was looking for. but y'know, even when you give a simple no, thanks reply that can also backfire as well. it can be hit or miss depending on whether or not you're dealing with a person that has a full basket or not. you got a basket case on your hands, secret

    good luck with that.
There was a time when I would respond back to my messages, even if I wasn't interested, just to say I wasn't interested. That time has long since passed, the atmosphere on here is way, way different than it was 10 years ago. People have gotten too comfortable with the anonymity of being a screenname online and don't really treat each other with respect anymore.


secret_lade 47F
9042 posts
1/11/2022 4:19 pm

Get the extinguisher!


secret_lade 47F
9042 posts
1/11/2022 4:19 pm

    Quoting hogknot:
    So "let's fuck" is not a good opening line? LOL Having been to a few dumpster fires, both literally and figuratively, I can say they are nothing but a pain in the ass.
Has it ever worked for you? LOL For me, no, not a good opening line. Now, if it's someone I've known for a while and felt an attraction to, that's a different story.


secret_lade 47F
9042 posts
1/11/2022 4:15 pm

    Quoting patchdriver:
    I had a handsome friend many years ago who told me he used a straight forward, blunt approach to pick up women. He insisted such an approach doesn't waste time and he knows exactly where he stands with her. I couldn't believe he used such a blatant approach until one time in a bar in Prince Albert. We were seated with three flight attendants we recognized from a regional airline, and out of the blue, he looked at one and said, "do you want to fuck?" She looked shocked but smiled and said, "yes". Off they went!
Wow! That is blunt and straight forward. LOL If it was someone I knew, I think I might say yes to a question like that. If it was someone i didn't know, I know I would say no. I wonder if it worked for him with women he may not have known.


secret_lade 47F
9042 posts
1/11/2022 4:12 pm

    Quoting EnigmaInitiative:
    Yeah, I felt pity on someone too, answered their question, and BOOM, I'm in the middle of whackadoodle town where the dude won't stop emailing me his opinions on women.

    Reiterated why I just stick to autoreply for most.
It's crazy, isn't it?? This particular guy described his life as a 'shit show'. Now, correct me if I'm wrong, but, if you're trying to actually MEET someone wouldn't you want to keep those details secret?? Yikes!


secret_lade 47F
9042 posts
1/11/2022 4:08 pm

    Quoting positively4you:
    Those types just need to call a hooker. But, I guess too poor or too cheap for it.
Never thought about it before, but, you're right. That's really all they are looking for.... I'm going to say they're too cheap over too poor, though, cause they willingly pay for their membership here. If they were too poor, they'd be standard.


secret_lade 47F
9042 posts
1/11/2022 4:06 pm

    Quoting lok4fun500:
    I don't use open liners because I'm only here to meet friends...NOT to hook up!
I like your style. That's one of the biggest differences I've found between the blogger community and the people I encounter elsewhere on here. The bloggers are, for the most part, very respectful and more a community, you can see they care. I feel very lucky that I get to be a part of that community.


secret_lade 47F
9042 posts
1/11/2022 4:00 pm

    Quoting HughJardon62:
    Makes me think of an old country song:
    "The Fireman" by George Strait.

    Happy Tuesday to you too!
Oh! What a bizarro synchronicity! Part of this particular guy's screenname is 'Fireman'. OMG!


secret_lade 47F
9042 posts
1/11/2022 3:58 pm

    Quoting Blueyedguy823:
    I like his tactic. I might have to try that.

    Of course I'm just kidding.
I hope you're just kidding! LOL


secret_lade 47F
9042 posts
1/11/2022 3:56 pm

    Quoting staci_19702:
    Oh hell. I’m sorry, but that’s funny.
    Ah, the horny, messaging drunks that stay up way to late and could’ve used that time to just shut up, masturbate and go to bed. I miss those. 🤣🤣
Maybe if they masturbated before they messaged, the messages would be a bit less desperate and hostile! LOL


secret_lade 47F
9042 posts
1/11/2022 3:51 pm

    Quoting G000dbuddy:
    use the info for good and not evil.. sometimes evil takes over
Unfortunately, yes it does.


secret_lade 47F
9042 posts
1/11/2022 3:50 pm

    Quoting mc_justmc:
    I don't respond to messages unless I have time to spare toying with a foreign
    scammer.
I knew you guys got those types of messages from time to time, I didn't realize just how often though. You would think there would be a way to weed that shit out.


secret_lade 47F
9042 posts
1/11/2022 3:48 pm

    Quoting Sakwes77:
    I don't know how many times I've responded to an add only to find myself talking to some bald guy in a grass hut in India.

    They have no shame, any ploy to get you to respond is okay with them.

    Last one, just a few days ago, claimed to be a divorced mom just looking to make new friends.
    No talk about sex or anything to suggest that was part of the game.

    Second message had all the warning signs, pictures of some young thing, half naked, begging for sex and the link. Yes the link, just to confirm m age of course, no CC required.

    The came the flood, message after message. Saying, did I offend you? I'm horny and waiting right now, I live just across the street from you? Please respond, I'm desperate.
    And every one with a new photo and that link. Hundreds of them.

    I might not fall for such tricks but I did meet a real person through those ads. And she does live in my neighborhood, and I have seen her in person. And we are now friends.
    Alas, she is married, to a jealous man so sex with her is out of the question.

    That's the most annoying thing about these scams. They do their research, they know how to appear to be a normal person to get you hooked.
So far, I haven't had any experiences like that. It could just be that there are far fewer women on here than men.... Or that the men tend to be a little more apt to reach out and start a conversation than a woman. It's too bad people there are people out there that do this stuff, it ruins it for everyone.


secret_lade 47F
9042 posts
1/11/2022 3:43 pm

    Quoting spunkycumfun:
    Sometimes I'm pleased I don't get much mail!
It'll come to me in spurts. I don't often respond back to my messages anymore.... Most of them are not worthy of a response. Messages I get from blog readers I always respond to, a few of my readers prefer to respond there and I'm ok with that, it gives me a little more freedom to share some things I wouldn't normally share in a blog comment.


secret_lade 47F
9042 posts
1/11/2022 3:40 pm

I know!! I was trying to be nice and just tell him the issues that some of the women face so he could have some insight on what to say to actually get the right attention. The next thing I know, he's revealing how his life has gone to shit but 'didn't want to share the details.' uh... huh...


pagancountrygirl 64F
6403 posts
1/11/2022 3:20 pm

That's why I love...and use the hell out of....the BLOCK feature! Not only do I click block when on the message section but I go into my blocked list and make sure all the boxes are checked and saved so I don't hear from that person again.

Pagan
Hmmmm....I know I left that wand around here somewhere!


MrRareity 62M  
4568 posts
1/11/2022 1:16 pm

I have 8" for ya if you can handle it...lol. I would never think in a million years to say that to someone I was trying to impress. But it doesn't surprise me that others do. I must admit that once again I was kind of laughing when I read this, I think I know you well enough that you weren't joking around. Here's an idea don't write back to him again instead write to me.

We have two lives, and the second begins when we realise we have only one - Confucious


citizen4722 64M  
74243 posts
1/11/2022 12:32 pm

Those openers are closures for sure


New2Midlo 52M  
1064 posts
1/11/2022 10:30 am

And this is why we don't respond to those who we aren't interested in, class.


jolielaide 50F  
1749 posts
1/11/2022 9:57 am

he asked for help and you did, you gave him some. my guess is that it wasn't the type of 'help' he was looking for. but y'know, even when you give a simple no, thanks reply that can also backfire as well. it can be hit or miss depending on whether or not you're dealing with a person that has a full basket or not. you got a basket case on your hands, secret

good luck with that.


boobwhisperer69 59M  
8159 posts
1/11/2022 9:43 am

Dumpster FIRE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


hogknot 55M  
1050 posts
1/11/2022 8:21 am

So "let's fuck" is not a good opening line? LOL Having been to a few dumpster fires, both literally and figuratively, I can say they are nothing but a pain in the ass.


patchdriver 66M/66F  
143 posts
1/11/2022 8:19 am

I had a handsome friend many years ago who told me he used a straight forward, blunt approach to pick up women. He insisted such an approach doesn't waste time and he knows exactly where he stands with her. I couldn't believe he used such a blatant approach until one time in a bar in Prince Albert. We were seated with three flight attendants we recognized from a regional airline, and out of the blue, he looked at one and said, "do you want to fuck?" She looked shocked but smiled and said, "yes". Off they went!


EnigmaInitiative 53F
5804 posts
1/11/2022 6:39 am

Yeah, I felt pity on someone too, answered their question, and BOOM, I'm in the middle of whackadoodle town where the dude won't stop emailing me his opinions on women.

Reiterated why I just stick to autoreply for most.

Friday Farm Day is up on the others side. Just wait till you see what's happening!


positively4you 72F  
4575 posts
1/11/2022 6:24 am

Those types just need to call a hooker. But, I guess too poor or too cheap for it.


lok4fun500 111M  
51627 posts
1/11/2022 5:57 am

I don't use open liners because I'm only here to meet friends...NOT to hook up!




care to check out the blog of A NORTHERN GENTLEMAN?
Private Mailbox
come join us ~THE CAMPFIRE~~ group!


HughJardon62 59M
90 posts
1/11/2022 5:45 am

Makes me think of an old country song:
"The Fireman" by George Strait.

Happy Tuesday to you too!

I'm a standard member, so normal messaging doesn't work.
But we can chat on my blog, "We Can Talk Here"


Blueyedguy823 55M  
1028 posts
1/11/2022 5:34 am

I like his tactic. I might have to try that.

Of course I'm just kidding.


staci_19702 51T  
3413 posts
1/11/2022 5:02 am

Oh hell. I’m sorry, but that’s funny.
Ah, the horny, messaging drunks that stay up way to late and could’ve used that time to just shut up, masturbate and go to bed. I miss those. 🤣🤣

Have a great day! 💋
Staci


G000dbuddy 34M  
1586 posts
1/11/2022 4:47 am

use the info for good and not evil.. sometimes evil takes over

goodbuddy781


mc_justmc 61M  
6928 posts
1/11/2022 4:20 am

I don't respond to messages unless I have time to spare toying with a foreign
scammer.


Sakwes77 67M  
153 posts
1/11/2022 3:36 am

I don't know how many times I've responded to an add only to find myself talking to some bald guy in a grass hut in India.

They have no shame, any ploy to get you to respond is okay with them.

Last one, just a few days ago, claimed to be a divorced mom just looking to make new friends.
No talk about sex or anything to suggest that was part of the game.

Second message had all the warning signs, pictures of some young thing, half naked, begging for sex and the link. Yes the link, just to confirm m age of course, no CC required.

The came the flood, message after message. Saying, did I offend you? I'm horny and waiting right now, I live just across the street from you? Please respond, I'm desperate.
And every one with a new photo and that link. Hundreds of them.

I might not fall for such tricks but I did meet a real person through those ads. And she does live in my neighborhood, and I have seen her in person. And we are now friends.
Alas, she is married, to a jealous man so sex with her is out of the question.

That's the most annoying thing about these scams. They do their research, they know how to appear to be a normal person to get you hooked.


spunkycumfun 61M/66F  
40611 posts
1/11/2022 2:30 am

Sometimes I'm pleased I don't get much mail!


MrWrong4RghtNow 55M  
2389 posts
1/11/2022 2:12 am

No good deed goes unpunished....hoo boy.

My name is MrWrong and I approved this comment


secret_lade 47F
9042 posts
1/11/2022 12:48 am

We'll talk about what NOT to say when trying to meet members of the opposite sex.

As you all know, it's the opening line that get's the attention.

Funny, intelligent, artfully crafted openers will draw me in every time... Long enough to catch my attention but not so long I'm reading about the best friend in kindergarten who grew up to be an eye doctor.

As a wearer of eye glasses.... I think I might actually like to meet that kindergarten best friend. I feel we may have something in common!

But, I digress...

Just keep it simple!

And, for God's sake, avoid these openers altogether!

-Are you real?
-im in town for the weekend wanna hookup
-i have 8 inces to feed ya
-I'm going through some shit, I'd like to just fuck for a while to get my mind off it.

I'm here to say, those openers?? Those openers are just a disaster waiting to happen. Nothing good can come of saying those words to ANYONE.

Especially me.

I see openers like this and and I see a smoldering dumpster fire just waiting to rage out of control. Exchange a message or two and you've got a blazing inferno of failed marriages and anger issues, topped off with a restraining order on top!

Yah..... No.

I had received one of those messages last weekend and did not respond. I was tempted to say, no I'm not real, but I didn't. I just left it unanswered and chose to move on.

But, when the sender messaged me again with a semi-heartfelt message stating he was new to the online dating scene and he needed some help, I felt bad for him.

And messaged him back.

I explained a few of the frustrations that I experience on the site in hopes that he could use it to better his approach, possibly help him out a little on his quest, and hoped he'd be able to use the info for good and not evil.

That backfired in my face, this dumpster fire is burning out of control now. Wish me luck folks, I'm going to need a pretty big fire extinguisher for this one!

Happy Tuesday!


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